My Valentine
This year I'm excited to say that I have a date for Valentine's Day!!! Who, you ask?
MY THIGHS!!!!
That's right, I'm dating my thighs this year and it's getting serious, so I'm making this day as special as I can for us. This morning started out with an almond croissant (our favorite) and about a gallon of coffee.
Now, don't tell my thighs, but I have a few fun activities planned for our romantic day together.
First of all, when you're dating someone who is a bit emotionally unstable (like my thighs) you only want to engage in activities that make that special someone feel most comfortable. Therefore, we will not be doing anything that requires too much movement (aka jiggle) unless it is in a very dark place, like a club (although, me and my thighs don't really like clubs). I'm taking us to a movie and bringing some special Valentine's Day snacks (a flask of Maker's Mark and a package of chocolate covered potato chips), oh and I should mention, we're seeing The Vow (my thighs don't get jealous when I joke about how much I love Channing Tatum!) It's the PERFECT Valentine's Day movie to see with someone you love. I can't wait.
After the movie, my thighs and I are going to go shopping for jackets because, like I said, you want to keep your date comfortable and happy on Valentine's Day and last time we went shopping for pants...well...you've seen Shallow Hal starring Gwyneth Paltrow, right? Speaking of, we will NOT be looking at any pictures of Gwyneth Paltrow, Blake Lively or anyone remotely beautiful, JUST BECAUSE.
Ummmm...
Tonight, we're staying in. I have a couple of super nice FIFTEEN dollar (yeah, I splurged) bottles of wine for me and my thighs to enjoy and a refrigerator full of more special treats (cheese, chocolate, gummy bears). We're going to curl up in bed and watch our favorite show of all time, Downton Abbey. Then, because we're like an old married couple, we'll probably pass out early (in a puddle of our own tears (of joy)...just because we're so in love and we can't believe how lucky we are to have each other).
Happy Valentine's Day.
MY THIGHS!!!!
That's right, I'm dating my thighs this year and it's getting serious, so I'm making this day as special as I can for us. This morning started out with an almond croissant (our favorite) and about a gallon of coffee.
Now, don't tell my thighs, but I have a few fun activities planned for our romantic day together.
First of all, when you're dating someone who is a bit emotionally unstable (like my thighs) you only want to engage in activities that make that special someone feel most comfortable. Therefore, we will not be doing anything that requires too much movement (aka jiggle) unless it is in a very dark place, like a club (although, me and my thighs don't really like clubs). I'm taking us to a movie and bringing some special Valentine's Day snacks (a flask of Maker's Mark and a package of chocolate covered potato chips), oh and I should mention, we're seeing The Vow (my thighs don't get jealous when I joke about how much I love Channing Tatum!) It's the PERFECT Valentine's Day movie to see with someone you love. I can't wait.
After the movie, my thighs and I are going to go shopping for jackets because, like I said, you want to keep your date comfortable and happy on Valentine's Day and last time we went shopping for pants...well...you've seen Shallow Hal starring Gwyneth Paltrow, right? Speaking of, we will NOT be looking at any pictures of Gwyneth Paltrow, Blake Lively or anyone remotely beautiful, JUST BECAUSE.
Ummmm...
Tonight, we're staying in. I have a couple of super nice FIFTEEN dollar (yeah, I splurged) bottles of wine for me and my thighs to enjoy and a refrigerator full of more special treats (cheese, chocolate, gummy bears). We're going to curl up in bed and watch our favorite show of all time, Downton Abbey. Then, because we're like an old married couple, we'll probably pass out early (in a puddle of our own tears (of joy)...just because we're so in love and we can't believe how lucky we are to have each other).
Happy Valentine's Day.
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